I get way too sensitive when I get attached to someone. I can detect the slightest change in the tone of their voice, and suddenly I’m spending all day trying to figure out what I did wrong.
“Life is long if you let it be.” - Jenny Han. “Ashes to Ashes.”
Approximately six years ago, my primary school best friend gave me this really fancy fill in all about yourself type book that had a series of envelopes in the back. I decided it would be a good idea to put a pack of barbie fashion cards in the back with a note that said barbie fashion cards. Then I sealed the album and wrote do not open until high school graduation. I opened it today and I was (even though I knew what it was) severely disappointed. I wish I had writer a letter to myself or something but no, just a couple of plastic cards and I didn’t even like barbie? How very 12ive of me.
I woke up at 8:30 today because we didn’t have to be at school by 10. I couldn’t get out of my bed because I thought if I get up then this day will start and high school will really truly and utterly end forever. I got there at 9:30 anyway and tried to pocket all the warm and fuzzies I had written. In total I’d done about 50 but lost several in the craziness of it all :// I felt so bad about it but there’s not much I can do now except mail some of them to two bffls i missed out on. At 10 we had our graduation morning tea and the SRC gave us little party bags with chocolates, stickers and a pack of tissues haha. There were some really nice canapés and the highlight of it all, a huge cake that was in the shape of a book with our school emblem and all 120 of our names etched into the icing. Everyone that mattered gave their addresses and I got a little bit teary but that was it.
At 11 we moved onto the quad where it was blindingly sunny as usual. Ever since Ive been at this school, it is always crazy hot come graduation. My roll call gave me a beautiful bouquet of flowers and there were another round of speeches. I got teary again but some people were sobbing and crying like ugly crying. We also sang our grad song which was to the tune of Olly Murs Dear Darling and it was really lovely. Usually the whole grade is bawling by then but I feel like our cohort weren’t big cryers. Everyone seemed pretty chill in my opinion which is good. I don’t think there should be so much crying anyway because as Gabriella so famously sang, "high school wasn’t meant to last forever". Then it was clap out where we literally walked out the gates whilst the school clapped us out. I was personally dreading this part because I don’t really associate with younger grades and I’m not exactly tight with teachers anyway. So I found some other girls and we linked arms, hugged the occasional teacher and got the hell out of there. HAHA.
Then when everyone was done with clap out we moved down a few roads to the venue for the night’s graduation dinner and went through some practice rounds, where we would be sitting, etc. Then we were dismissed and my friends and I had lunch at Three Beans. I split a roast vegetable sandwich and a mexican wrap which was so so yummy. It tasted like nachos in a wrap. :)) Then I went back home and edited all the photos from the day and I started reading Ashes to Ashes. By then I was almost ceebs to leave the house.
We started getting ready for the dinner at 6 and I was super stressed because we were meant to get there at 6:30 but we didn’t leave the house until 29. So I was super pissed but it turns out they were just scaring us into getting there on time because the ceremony didn’t really start until quarter past 7. More speeches happened and the moment we had been waiting for, forever finally happened. It was a for-e-ver process. Considering there was a mere 120 people, it took a hella long time. A name was called, their baby photo and year 12 photo would flash up on the projector, we’d shake hands with the principal, take a photo with him, walk on the stage, receive a white rose and take another photo with our certificates. I was so scared I would do something really dumb and make a fool out of myself but I was all good thank god. It also felt less nerve racking because people were too focused on aww-ing over the baby photos. Then we sang the grad song from the morning again and finally headed back to our families for dinnnnnnner.
For entree, I had a prawn salad, the main was steak and dessert I had part pavlova and part chocolate volcano cake. The food was pretty good except I didn’t really like the main because it was super big and they went pretty heavy on the wine in the sauce. Then the people on my table decided it was good idea to get signatures from teachers so we went over to them and awkwardly asked them for our autographs in our portfolios. I did get the principal, assistant principal and all my teachers so that was nice but I also got the random german teacher WTF? She kinda offered and I didn’t want to say no but Ive literally never been in a single one of a class let alone seen her around the school bahahahaa.
After my friends and I made that move, I guess everyone started to loosen up because we were all moving around, getting autographs, it was really fun. Then the music started playing and we did some insane scream-dancing and it was a good night. We took more photographs and polaroids and I was so so happy. I think our school did a million really nice things that made the last day so much more special. The portfolio was navy with gold script, and all the namecards had a really pretty school emblem pin and we each got a copper bookmark with a school emblem that said once a (school name) girl, always a (school name) girl. So so lovely. I think the dinner ended at 10 but no one really started to leave until an hour later. We collected our warm and fuzzies and my family and I drove home.
So all in all, it was a pretty great day to end high school. I couldn’t read any of my warm and fuzzies for fear of overwhelming emotion so I decided to rip through ashes to ashes instead. I loved all the Rillia scenes and even though I didn’t love the way everyone ended up turning out to be … I really liked the epilogue a lot. So much that I made my favourite quote, the title of this post.
Just a quick FYI: this is two days late because I’ve been procrastinating doing these because once i write it down i fear it will become real and right now I’m in that in between stage where I’m blissfully ignorant of the direness of my situation.
So today was physicale … and also our school’s attempt at giving us something of a free day. Everyone was in either mufti or junior uniform and I was in my junior uniform which was a struggle to put on because I er have hips now. We took a bunch of pictures and my friend was nice enough to give me a polaroid :’) I want one so bad but idk I feel like the film is ridiculously expensive.
We spent period one going over the grade act and then at recess I skipped over to target with my friend to get polaroid film and then I practiced my group act which was stressful. Haha. Then halfway through lunch the day concert started and our Shake It Off dance got a decent amount of whoops but the final grade act was a bit of a fail because our year advisors were meant to walk down when we were grinding to treasure but they missed their cue and then when we ran into the aisles to do bop to the top everyone had no idea where to run. The day concert finished at 2:30 and that was when the struggle became real. We had to wait literally 5 hours until the night concert began. So my friends and I had quiet time and then we went over to Westfield for butter chicken and a good walk around. I almost bought a pair of mittens that said yes/maybe on each side because they were like 2 bucks but I resisted because Im wise and not a impulsive person ( I try guys I try).
Somehow in between selfies and food, I managed to sustain myself until 7 and the night concert was in full swing. The atmosphere WAS INSANE compared to the afternoon one and all the acts got better! Thank goodness. It was really fun and my dad picked me up at 9:30, I got home ten minutes later, started my mindy project download and took a shower. Then I simu-watched TMP with my friend and we both agreed that it was a good episode. It was in typical Mindy fashion, cringe embarrassingly funny and my highlight was when Danny started playing Let It Go on the piano. OH CASTELLANO you bae.